Difference Perspective Changes My Outlook & Attittude

Last week was one of the most scheduled busy weeks I've had in quite a while.  While most had to do with some new assignments at work, and the consequential "making up " regular work I missed while off on new assignments, the task I' want to share here was a volunteer gig.

Genius Golfer and I were asked to "chaperone" a dance on Friday night.  Now, with 15+ years of PTA work under my belt, I have chaperoned plenty of things--including dances at the high school.  But this one was different.  It was a singles dance for church.  It was for church members in the regional area aged 31 and above.

My first thought was, "Why do adults need a chaperone at their dance?"  Then I remembered, this will likely be less a "chaperone" assignment as a set-out-food-and-guard-it.  Like all church activities, there is food available, and there is always someone who scarfs down the food way beyond his portion allowed.

Our friends, Trevor and Janelle--another married couple from our ward, were also there, but Trevor was ultimately in charge of the whole things as his assignment on the high council includes the single adults.  At least I could visit with Janelle and catch up with a grown up outside of the Primary circle.  Plus volunteering is a good thing, in my opinion.

When we got there, GG and I got busy arranging food: fruit, chips, cookies.  Trevor was working on a chocolate fountain.  Then things started going wrong.  No DJ showed up.

Trevor, being in charge of this event, called another neighbor who has DJ'd in the past as has the equipment.  Dave was in Provo on a date with his wife Amy.  They rearranged their schedule to come back to PG and get a dance going.

While that was happening, the chocolate fountain quit working, while full of mostly melted chocolate.  GG and I ran home to unearth our fountain and bring it down to substitute.  Brush off the dust, we'll be fine.

As we sat that up and transferred the melty chocolate into the new fountain, the original DJ rolled in.  Uh oh.  Now we have potentially 2 DJs.  Trevor put out that fire by calling Dave back and apologizing and explaining the situation.  The original guy set up and never was the wiser.  Dave and Amy popped over to see the fallout and to talk to Trevor.  Sorry they had to cut their date night short, but at least they were willing to help.  Things happen, I figure.

People were beginning to arrive now.  Trevor handed me a metal badge with "USHER" boldly printed on it.  I laughed and said that was funny.  He told me "Nope, you'd better wear it or you'll get hit on."

I laughed out loud that time and told him I thought he was pulling my leg. He just insisted I wear it.  GG had one too as did Janelle.  We looked like we were part of a club.  But I put it on to be obedient.

Here is where the evening began to get crazy.

Before I knew it men were coming in asking where the rest of the food was.  we had directions to put the food out in one area and shut the door until 9:30.  There was an hour of dance instruction--like a dance class: foxtrot, waltz, line dances--while people were showing up.  The actual dance began about 9:30 or 10PM.

These guys were pressing harder for food.  Each time we politely told them not until 9:30, they had rude things to say.  This dance cost them $5 to get in, and as far as I could see, none of these vacuuming food dudes had even danced.  Cheap dinner, I guess.  But rude!

Finally, things got sorted out with the dancing, the food, and the DJ and all was beginning to run smoothly.  Trevor gave us instructions to walk the halls of the building occasionally to see that no one was heading into the darker corners.  Also, we have instruction to take a lap now and then to patrol the parking lot and exterior of the building for the same reasons.  Apparently, some men never learn that "No" means no and have tried to push their (percieved) advantage, so some of this was for safety but there was also the "church dance standards" to uphold here too. 

When I've done this job with the Youth (ages 12-18) we just didn't want them sneaking off to make out or something, but here we are talking about adults.  They should be mature enough not to do that in a church building, but I assume much with that thought.  With the Youth, there was never a white board a tthe entrance that had to read: Divorces MUST be Final. 

People ARE crazy, you know.

Anyway, the dance progressed.  Janelle and I took a loop in the gym where the dancing was happening.  After  a quick lap, we sat together in a corner to watch and chat.  Almost immediately after we started talking, a lovely gentleman of about 70 came up to ask us to dance.  (In his defense, I think he was making a lap himself, to be sure every lady had a chance to dance that wanted to.  Bless him.)  But being the married folks at this shin-dig, Janelle kindly pointed to her badge and said that we were there are ushers and, thank you but no.  He looked a little sheepish, but moved on to another lady sitting down on the outside of the dancing.

That wasn't the last of my attempted pick ups.  But it was the nicest.

At another point, I was bringing in a replacement fruit tray for the chocolate fountain and halfway into the door of the "food room" I had a gentleman (a term I use loosely here) of about 80+, standing with a single crutch, wearing grey sweat pants and a partially zipped hooded sweatshirt, with only some of his teeth, look as my chest (!!!!)--but not see my USHER badge--and ask me "How you doin?"  Ewww.  It was creepy. 

The evening seemed to move at a glacier pace until finally it was the last song of the night.  We had the last of the opened food out and I was past ready to clean up and go home.  Suddenly these people were grabbing two and three plates and loading them with all the food they could carry away with them.  I had others--women too this time--come into the kitchen and ask where the ziploc bags were as they wanted to take the veggies and fruit home with them.  Cookies were grabbed by the handful.  Cups were filled with grapes and pineapple and chips and cheese dip.  It was embarrassing, really.

These are gown, mature--in some cases VERY mature--adults. But I have seen better behavior at junior high dances.  Only one lady asked where the vacuum was hidden and she began to help clean up.  The rest fled with food in hand as fast as they could go. I was shocked and quite surprised that this sort of thing went on with grown ups.

We did finally get everything cleaned up and came home, but I learned something.  At some point during the night, I asked Trevor how he came to asking GG and I to help wit this.  Teasingly, he told me that he asked the bishop which couple was hitting s rough patch in their marriage and that was the couple they'd invite to help here.  Of course, he was kidding, but on the way home I thought about that.

I have never been more happy to be married to GG than I was that night.  I felt real sadness for my dear, darling, single girlfriends who are stuck with this kind of junior-high behavior peer group to try to look for a husband.  No wonder they were so discouraged.  And now, I knew that I couldn't just tell them to "hang in there" or "something will work out".  If this was the selection, they had no chance for someone normal, nice and well-mannered.

My only hope for them, and the men in their demographic is that the normal ones stayed home.  And that made me happier yet that I was home with GG and The Boy and never had to be in that group.  YOUNG single adults--the 18-30 group--was bad enough, once upon a time.

Weekend Update

Over the years on Saturday Night Live, the Weekend Update segment was always one of my favorites--regardless of who was the "anchor" that season.Chevy Chase was great, back in the day.  And I loved Jimmy Fallon and Tina Fey together too.

But there will be no wise cracking current event satire today.  Just a weekend update of a fun, but too fast weekend from here.

The Girl had Friday off for their "Fall Break", so she came home for a long weekend.  Plus, she had three friends whose mission farewells were this weekend.  I didn't think we'd really see that much of her, considering her closest friends are NOT at USU.  But we did and I think she had a great balance of family and friends this weekend.

Thursday night Genius Golfer had been to his Men's Association at the Golf Course and spent the evening golfing--so it was after 7 when he got home.  By then, The Boy and The Girl and I had already been laughing and catching up and even sat down to watch one of our favorite sitcom shows together.  GG had recorded it, so when we were done, he watched it while the kids and I moved to the front room and continued laughing and catching up.  GG promptly fell asleep.  This happens regularly when he sits in the recliner at the end of the day to watch TV or a movie.

Finally I told the kids that I had to work tomorrow, so I needed to go to bed--along with The Boy who still had school too.  So we headed off to bed.

Friday The Girl had several errands to run--friends to see, teachers to drop in on, items to shop for--so she was busy with friends most of the day. That night The Boy went to the HS football game, The Girl visited some friends at BYU, and I did laundry.

Saturday, The Boy had his Sadie Hawkins date.  Remember, around here there is a "day date" portion too, so the girls picked up their dates about noon and the kids in their group spent the afternoon at Corn Belly's--a corn maze, haunted house, and fall festival rolled into one.

Brianna is a cute girl.  And The Boy said they had lots of fun.

The Girl and I did some of my errands--you know the boring things, like Costco.  But we also found The Girl a pair of leather gloves and a hat.  the winter chill is settling in there faster than here I guess.  But it was  anice way to spend the day--after not seeing her for two months.

Then later that night, the girls in the Sadie Hawkin's group stopped by to pick up The Boy again for the date part of the date.  the theme for the dance was "The Great Gatsby" so the dress was more costume-y than usual Sadie dances.

 Blinkers....

There you go!  That is more like it.  I told The Boy, after seeing what Brianna wore, we should have found him a black bow tie.  But he was fine.  They all sound like the had a great time.

Sunday I taught my Primary class, GG and The Boy went to their classes, The Girl went to three different meetings for the farewells before we all ended up at home for about an hour before her ride back to Logan go there.  Luckily, she brought back two favorite friends--Marina and Hannah P.  I sat at the table with the girls and laughed at their silly stories and comparisons of the events together that weekend.

Then before you know it, The Girl's ride was here.  she jumped in an was gone, followed quickly by Hannah P and Marina. GG, The Boy and I tried to watch Nacho Libre together.  But I ended up finishing my book I was reading instead.

It was  so good to have The Girl home for a few days.  Makes me a little more excited about Thanksgiving.

The Answer Is....

 This is as crafty as he has been since Cub Scouts!

 The note says: "With BAIT like that.....(and on the back) I'm HOOKED!"  We tried to keep with the fish theme.

The bowl she brought the fish in--they only lived two days...we are hard on fish around here...is filled with gummy worms and his note with several worms on actual fish hooks and the hook strings are tied with a ribbon to the card.

Since Genius Golfer was in charge of FHE last night, he opted to make answering Briana for The Boy our FHE activity.  I can pretty much guarantee that The Boy will answer his date invitations sooner next time.

You Know You Have a Cute Teenaged Boy When...

Last week The Boy was invited to the school's Sadie Hawkins' dance.  And in the asking, he also gained two new friends:

The new "friends" lasted two whole days.  That is twice as long as The Girl's first "friends".  It was a cute invitation.  And he is working on the answer.  I have urged him to get a move on--the poor girl isn't sure he has accepted yet.  I'll show youwhat he ended up doing once he figures it out.

Homecoming 2013

This year it was The Boy's turn to try the Homecoming dance with a date.  He asked a girl that worked at the pool all summer and he was pretty excited, to be honest.  He went with four other good buddies and their dates.  Because of some rain we didn't expect, the photos of the couples and the group in the park--as was planned--gave way to Plan B which was photos in our front room.

 Ben and Emily...

 Ashton and Savannah...

 The Boy and Kylee....

 Sam and Jenna...

 Collin and Tristan...

 The whole lovely group...

Who had a GREAT time together!

It's a Sadie's Hawkins Halloween

Tonight The Girl and three friends took out their dates for the high school's Sadie Hawkins dance.  It was a "Halloween/Thriller" theme dance, but the girls didn't want to mess much with costumes--so they decided on a variety of funny accessories and sticky back mustaches.  So much for undefined creativity.  They did ask me to take their pictures--in the local cemetery.    Maybe that was enough.

I hope they have a great time.

Homecoming 2012

It was Homecoming weekend here this past weekend.  The Girl was asked by a friend she's been in school with since kindergarten.  He is very fun!!

 Good friend, Marina and Hannah P came over early and did The Girl's hair and consulted on the make-up.  Dressy, but casual.  Just the way I like it!

 Did you know they make magnetic boutineers now?  Yes.  They do. Brilliant!

 So much easier than maneuvering those blasted big pins!

 And whomever invented the wrist corsage was also a genius!

 So much easier!

 Smiles started right from the start with the ease of floral gifts exchanged by the dates....

 Good friends make this kind of date a fun and friendly event!

 And being comfortable in your own skin (and clothes) helps too!

They looked great and sounds like they had a great time together.  And kudos to the group of boys (all of whom are int he same ward) who planned their date together--and asked girls that already knew each other (they all worked together at the pool this summer) so the girls knew everyone and everyone was already friends...brilliant planning, boys!!

Here We Go Again

The Girl didn't seem too worried about being asked to homecoming this year.  Maybe she learned that lesson when she wasn't asked last year.  But for whatever her reasoning, she seems lukewarm about it.  Until Saturday night.

Saturday night The Boy had about 6 football friends over to play ("Mom, we don't 'PLAY', we hang out!"), or I mean, HANG OUT in the hot tub and then play/hangout some football game on the XBox.  About the time I started thinking, "Aren't these boys going home?" there was a very assured knock on the door.  The boys weren't bothered by the knocking--all their buddies were already in the house, so it wasn't for them.  So The Girl answered it.

There was a delicious berry peach pie with a simple note...inviting her to homecoming. (PS--I am not sure what happened that the invite photo is turned sideways...it was right as I imported it...but you get the idea.)

Devan is one of her Trek "brothers" and they have known each other all their school years.  They went to elementary together.  He is a delightful boy and super fun.  The Girl made the comment that she was glad it was someone not from "their group" because it takes some pressure off.

That made me wonder what kind of pressure "their group" was exerting, but let's not think of that.

So then she had to answer him..and it can't be just a simple phone call to say "Yes".  So she decided to make him a pie.

Her favorite kind of pie is a Key Lime, thanks to a deliciously good one Uncle Joey makes regularly.  So The Girl spent the morning backing key lime pie--and ended up with 2 pies and a dozen tarts.  Apparently I had the 'wrong' kind f prepared graham cracker crust.

After her last day of work yesterday (the pool closes for the season after Labor Day), she and good pal Megan delivered her answer. 

Guess it is a good thing we found a few dresses when we did.  But those photos will have to wait a few weeks.  The Homecoming Dance is Sept 22nd.