We Are Off

This little ripper swimstud is The Boy last summer at one of the swim meets. Today we are off to the indoor swim arena at BYU where our delightful niece, Miss Riss, will help The Boy with his swimming and life saving merit badges. He is working on achieving both at the same time and she is a merit badge counselor for each one. Our pool isn't open for the season yet, so off to Cougar-ville we go. Wish us luck.

Welcome Spring!

Did you get up at 5:44 this morning to welcome spring?! Yeah, me neither. But I am sure happy that the curse of that blasted Groundhog is past now. Spring is sprung! Bring on the heat!

The promise of warm days, filled with sunlight, and yards coming back to life! that is best part of spring. I love to leave the hoodie in the closet in the mornings and be perfectly comfortable all day. I love to see the tulips pop up into my flower bed after sleeping int he dirt all winter long. I especially love to see my neighbors again who, like the tulips, have hibernated the winter away inside their homes. There is a camaraderie as we all weed the flowers, prep the lawns, mow the grass, sweep the driveways and take down the last of the Christmas lights safely.

Makes me feel better already. But that probably only means that Monday we'll see snow again. Drat. That is how ironic nature seems to be sometimes. I'll still take the near 70 degree day we are expecting today.

I Am...

I think… all the time
I know… that God lives and loves me
I want… my family to be together forever
I have… the best husband in the world
I wish… I could relax easier
I hate… being late
I miss… my mom being close by
I fear… snakes and every creature that slithers without legs
I hear… spring coming when the neighbor kids are out playing ball together
I smell… sweaty boys quicker than anything else
I wonder… how the Lord will judge the world in the end
I regret… not spending more time playing with my kids when they were little
I love… crispy, clean sheets
I care… about how my actions affect others
I always… wish I could do better
I am not… always confident
I believe… what goes around comes around, eventually
I dance… better in my head
I sing…in the car
I don’t… enjoy slimy foods
I write… nearly every day
I win… occasionally
I lose… games when we play as a family
I dislike… selfishness
I never… want to disappoint my parents
I listen… to books on my iPod to tune out life
I can usually be found… at the Gas ’n Sip once a day
I am scared… I haven’t prepared well enough
I read… books that I enjoy over and over again
I am happy about… how my kids seem to be faring in this crazy world so far
I dare… to hope they will be as good as I wish them to be
I hope… I can be half the mom my own mother is
I notice… stuff I haven’t gotten to yet
I clean… when I want to turn over a new leaf
I express… gratitude as often as I can
I talk… faster than I think
I go… to the temple twice a month
I drive… too fast on the freeway
I watch… recorded television in order to fast-forward commercials
I dream… random things
I need… to vacuum the family room, dust the piano, clean the windows
I haven’t… dusted in months
I tell… my worries to the Lord, a lot
I find… He already knows them
I run… faster than I have strength some days
I quit… stressing about my weight
I jump… to the worst case scenario, just in case
I learn… lessons the hard way at times
I play… but I don’t find it comfortable
I own… a clear conscience
I make… stacked enchiladas from memory
I live… better than I deserve to
I bring… another viewpoint
I open…the fridge or internet when I am bored
I will… serve as Council PTA president in the fall
I suppose… that means I am insane to a degree
I vote… my conscience
I buy… carefully
I fold… laundry before I put it away
I stand… by my friends
I can… disagree without being disagreeable, most of the time
I wear… what is comfortable
I smile… as often as I can
I cry… more than I want to
I care… about the kids in our schools
I pray… for my family’s safety every day
I make…family a priority
I like… a lot of British humor
I move… slowly after 9 PM
I swear… under my breath occasionally
I try… not to do it out loud
I find… stuff for everyone around here
I draw…stick people and stick dogs
I expect… everyone to pull their own weight
I work… to show a good example
I admire…people who are consistently kind and gentle
I adore… the language of Jane Austen
I fantasize… I am Elizabeth Bennett
I look… for good deals
I cherish… my husband and children
I appreciate…help from others
I treasure… friendships
I could… live where it was warm year round

What Do You Do?

I have been amused that my kids don't seem to have a clue what I do each day. I have noticed this more and more as they are branch out in their turn at family prayers. For a long while the semantics of their prayers was essentially the same; "Be Safe", "Make good friends", "Have Fun".

Then they started praying for "Dad to do good at work", "Us to listen to our teachers", for "X to get better", "Friends to be happy", and "Grandma and Grandpa to have what they need".

I am an enigma.

For quite some time now I have been addressed in their prayers by way of "Please help Mom get whatever it is she does done." Sometimes it includes "Whatever she wants to get done" but in the particulars that would be the same intent.

Being a list maker, I tried to show them my daily "To Do" list, but it doesn't seem to affect them. They just don't get it. I am still doing mysterious things at home or at school or at Aunt Tammy's or with PTA. They know when I have done their laundry because they have to take it back upstairs and put it away. Other than that, as far as they know, I could be the next James Bond or Jack Bauer or Sam Spade.

I think it is funny.

How often, as a Mom, do I really get to be mysterious? Or covert and cryptic? Or puzzling and perplexing? OK, maybe I am taking this farther than they do. They just don't pay attention; In truth, my life isn't that exciting. But it nice to imagine.

Book Club

I have been part of a book club since the fall after The Girl was born. My darling neighbor began our ward book club while she was serving as Education counselor in our Relief Society. I was the RS secretary at the time and felt I should go to support her efforts, plus it gave me hope that with a newborn at home I wouldn't let me brain turn to mush.

Since that beginning, we have seen Etta widowed, gone on a mission, returned to marry a sweet man across town, move to his place, include her new ward in book club, serve several "on assignment" auditing missions, and eventually our little neighborhood book club has become a community group.

It has been harder for me to be excited about book club for the last few years. I still go at the beginning when we choose books. I volunteer to host the October meeting--so I won't forget it is coming. I am fine with leading a discussion of a book I enjoyed. But I don't attend each month. I pick the book selections I really want to read and go to those.

This month Etta, a former English teacher and extremely well read for her own enjoyment, will lead our discussion on Victor Hugo's classic, Les Miserables. She chose a translation and abridgement that she used when she taught her students this novel in school. I feel in love with the Broadway musical while in college--I've seen it live three times--and had made an attempt to read the unabridged version. I failed at the unabridged novel, but wanted to try reading it again.

I still love the story: Jean Valjean's repentance and redemption. I think it is as powerful as any parable in the scriptures. I feel his choices as he reaches each decision. I understand his confusion as the Bishop gives him the candlesticks and sends him out to be a better man, a man of God. And I am anxious to get Etta's take on it as she gets into her teacher-groove with us.

But I think I am done with Book Club after that.

I enjoy reading for fun, but the other ladies that have since joined have gotten a little too cerebral for me to find the fun in reading with them. It isn't that I only read mindless books. I don't think I do. But I do prefer books I find light and happy. I like reading different authors, but they all don't have to be life crushing stories of deprivation and pain to learn a good moral from them. Some of these ladies analyze even fun stories to the brink of death.

Have you read The Princess Bride? You know, the funny story from which the hilarious movie was made? The book is better than the film--they always are--but after reading it for book club, one member commandeered the discussion and came away with the theme that "Life is pain, princess" as the actual life lesson from that book. It was the most bizarre take on an otherwise delightful story. Things have gone downhill from there for me.

I want to read for fun. I don't allow myself a lot of time to read each day--there are too many other things that need to be done--so when I do read, it ought to be for my enjoyment. Not to prove my mental tenacity to women about whom I don't care what they think of me.

So I think I am done. Just as soon as my visit to Jean Valjean and the Paris barricades is over.

So Much for That

I only got two lines written yesterday before I had to run. I was running all day. So much for the "day of rest". So much for posting anything yesterday.

I have a lot of things rolling through my mind this morning, but nothing seems to be sticking to the page. Some days I feel a lot of inspiration to write, other days something has really been bugging me for I can write, other days I just hope something comes to mind. Apparently there are days when there is a void.

I will tell you all how much I dislike Scouting at the moment. The Boy is only 11 and I am just not loving this program. I am sure that there are a lot of great things for him, but so far, I am not seeing the wisdom in doing this as a Young Men's activity system.

The Boy had a Board of Review last night. Still no rank advancement. Poor kid. He has a dumb mom who knows nothing of scouting. I thought my job was to sign him up for merit badge classes, make up what he missed at Scouts when he has a conflicting event the same night, and sew on patches. Apparently not.

What I would really like to see is an orientation meeting for parents. You know, like a Scouting for Dummies kind of thing. They might explain that there are requirements for moving your boy up in rank that overlap and you could work on things simultaneously thus moving him along faster.

They could explain that merit badges are only part of the deal. You as a parent also have to guess what is going on each week, grill your child as if you were a 1930s FBI agent on the trail of a mob boss to get information home about what they did and what the leader said they were planning on doing.

They could explain that if your boy doesn't get into this program at a very early point, the love is gone and you may never get him back into it.

But they don't tell you any of this.

I even when looking for a Scouting for Dummies handbook. Nothing. So much for looking for information that might save my kid's interest in a program that his dad thinks is lame too. Genius Golfer had a terrible scouting experience so he has opted out of working through this with The Boy. Again, it would have been nice to know that option was available.

There are days I would like to opt out and let The Boy do other things he is interested in. But I try to support what the local group is doing, with the hopes that The Boy will enjoy what is going on and that he and the other boys will be buddies as they get older.

Yeah, it isn't happening yet. In the meantime, I thought I could write the Scouting for Dummies book, but I don't even know enough to do that. So much for that thought.