The Story of Tony and Marge

A friend sent this little email story to me this week.  It made me laugh, especially after my memory-worries of last week.  I can feel for Tony here.  How about you?

Tony and Marge were 85 years old and had been married for sixty years. Though they were far from rich, they managed to get by because they carefully watched their pennies.


Though not young, they were both in very good health, largely due to Marge's insistence on healthy foods and exercise for the last decade.

One day, their good health didn't help when they went on yet another holiday vacation and their plane crashed, sending them off to Heaven.

They reached the pearly gates, and St. Peter escorted them inside. He took them to a beautiful mansion, furnished in gold and fine silks, with a fully stocked kitchen and a waterfall in the master bath. A maid could be seen hanging their favorite clothes in the closet. They gasped in astonishment when he said, 'Welcome to Heaven. This will be your home now.'

Tony asked Peter how much all this was going to cost. 'Why, nothing,' Peter replied, 'remember, this is your reward in Heaven.'

Tony looked out the window and right there he saw a championship golf course, finer and more beautiful than any ever built on Earth..

'What are the greens fees?,' grumbled Tony..

'This is heaven,' St. Peter replied. 'You can play for free, every day.'

Next they went to the clubhouse and saw the lavish buffet lunch.

'Don't even ask,' said St. Peter to Tony. This is Heaven, it is all free for you to enjoy.'

Tony looked around and nervously asked Marge 'Well, where are the low fat and low cholesterol foods and the decaffeinated tea?'

'That's the best part,' St. Peter replied. 'You can eat and drink as much as you like and you will never get fat or sick. This is Heaven!'

'No gym to work out at?' said Tony

'Not unless you want to,' was the answer.

'No testing my sugar or blood pressure or...'

'Never again.'

Tony glared at Marge and said, 'You and your Bran Flakes. We could have been here ten years ago!'

Number 5 of 6

Last night I got a text from Austin,The Professor, one of my trek boys.  His brother got married yesterday, he is playing football for BYU and his mission call arrived.  He texted me to tell me where he was called.

Monteal, Quebec, Canada: French speaking.

That is so great!  He is the fifth of my six trek boys with a mission call so far.  I have three that are already out serving the Lord.  They are all over the world.  Josh is in the Philippines.  Jake is in Brazil.  Spencer is in the MTC for another week or so and then will be in Pittsburgh.  And Rickey has his call to serve in Ukraine come November.  With Austin's call, I just have to hear from Taylor and all six will be (shortly) full time missionaries.  And that is really cool.

What is really, really, cool, is that even two years later--after trek, I mean--these boys are still as dear to me as they were when we got out into the Wyoming wilderness in July 2009.  Several of them have been away to school for a semester or so, and others stayed home to work until they left.  Yet, all along the way they have been preparing to serve. They knew two years ago they wanted to serve.  Heck, these six boys have known most of their lives they wanted to serve missions.  That is just the kind of young men they are.

And I am so proud of them.  They are strong, faithful, kind, diligent and hopeful men.  I love them all.

What's That Song From "Fiddler on the Roof"?

Last night I went to a reception for a young woman in my neighborhood, whom I have known for years.  She got married yesterday.  Her mom is one of my Dear Friends.  The couple were married in the temple. The groom is a returned missionary.  His mom is our state representative on Capitol Hill in Salt Lake City. The bride is nineteen years old.

Miss T looked beautiful. And her family was happy for her.  How could they not be?  She did this the right way, in the right place.

I just hope it was the right time too.  Sometimes I think we emphasize the temple wedding part more than the eternal marriage part.  You know what I mean?  Are these young newlyweds prepared for the ordinance and celebration of their big day?  Or are they really prepared to begin their lives together that will last forever?

There is a difference.  And if they are not prepared for the second part there, the joy and magic of the first part will wear off sooner that the frosting on a piece of cake.

I wasn't quite 23 when Genius Golfer and I married.  I was four months away from a bachelor's degree.  I'd lived in four apartments with six sets of roommates by then.  I'd had some pretty amazing experiences in college and in life before we decided to hitch our combined wagons to a star and get married.  And we both came into it with our eyes open to the long term commitment we were making.  We still didn't know what we were getting into.

Do the kids today do all that?

Tonight I have another wedding reception to go to in our town.  The son of one of my PTA friends is getting married.  His bride was the object of his high school boyhood crush.  They have both been away to school.  He served a mission halfway around the world.  She has lived in other places in the world.  And has, certainly, had roommates and life experience and some education under her belt.

She will be beautiful too.  And everyone will be happy for the young couple.

Where does the time go?  How old can I possibly be with kids this age getting married?  And how glad am I that I was able to make my own decision about who and when I married?  I'll try to keep my opinion to myself and pray that they all know what they are getting themselves into. 

Of course they don't.  No one ever does.  That is what makes it an adventure.

The Weight of Words

One of fabulous junior high secretaries made a nice comment on something I wore to the school the first week or so.  It made me realize that I generally go for the uniform--solid color t-shirt and jeans; making no real effort in my appearance other than "try to be clean". 

After her kind words, I have tried to do better and dress more professionally, if anything.  Not that I have gone out and bought a lot of business clothes, but I have just taken more care in putting something one that looks grown up but still cute.  So far I think it is working.

This same secretary, is about my height, but of slighter build than me (and really, who isn't?!).  She always comments about how cute my shirt is, or where did I find such a flattering blouse.  I gotta say, it is very motivational to my effort.

Wouldn't it be nice if there was always someone who made a kind comment every time you tried a little more to do your best?  That would be so much more helpful than the inner dialogue I have with myself.  You know the one that goes like this:

--This is clean.  I can wear this.
--That?  Ugh.  Your belly really pooches out in that pair of pants.
--But if I wear a long enough shirt no one will even notice.
--If you wear that long shirt, you'll like you are hiding a second trimester pregnancy.
--Or I could try to wear that blouse I just ironed.
--Did you hear yourself?  You had to iron that one.  So not worth it.  You'll just have to wash it and then iron it again.  And you know how much you hate ironing.

Do you hear that voice in your head too?  That Negative Nancy who just cuts at every thought you might have had that was positive?

With the secretary going out of her way to say kind things about what I am wearing, she makes me feel better about myself and certainly about making the effort to look not-like-a-junior-high-student.  She hasnt' got a big motivation to say these things, other than she is a wonderful woman with a very good heart--I mean, she works at a junior high, need I say more?!  Yet her uplifting words are well worth it to me. 

And I have thought since, how am I using my words?  Am I uplifting someone else with the things I say?  And I being sincere when I say them?  Do the people around me feel better about themselves for the things I say to them?

Maybe I need to reevaluate the words I am using to others...and to myself.  Words are powerful things.  Use them with caution.

Conference Report

Several of you know that I had an assignment to speak in our Stake conference this weekend.  For the sake of my parents, and any others who are interested, today's post is the text of that talk.  I know I should be moving toward speaking from a outline format, but in front of a group, I have a tendency to get nervous enough to chatter away on rambling tangents and not stick to the assigned topic.  So I have been trying to write it all out and then review it enough times that it sounds light and breezy and casual in the delivery.  Well, as casual a delivery as a stake conference talk can sound.

I appreciate seeing so many of you here today, especially given President A. gave you the heads up last night that I would be speaking this morning. If it's OK with each of you, I'd like to think of that as a vote of confidence as I begin with more than a bit of nerves and, typical for me, emotions that are very close to the surface.


In our current Visiting Teaching message, Sister Julie B. Beck, General Relief Society president, said: "I have felt that there has never been a greater need for increased faith and personal righteousness. There has never been a greater need for strong families and homes." Our Stake Challenge this year is certainly one way to directly fulfill that greater need.

I was asked to share some of my personal experiences as I put this challenge to work in my life. I appreciate the wisdom and thoughtfulness of our stake presidency in presenting us with the second step of our journey to be a Zion people. After Prayer, our Scripture Study--particularly as we study the life of Jesus Christ recorded in the scriptures-- is the step we must make to help us draw closer to Him and to, collectively, draw us to Becoming Zion, with one heart and one mind, with hearts knit together in love.

My mind keeps coming back to Doctrine & Covenants section 19, verse 23, that reads "Learn of me, and listen to my words; walk in the meekness of my Spirit, and you shall have peace in me." We have been invited to Come Unto Christ, by the Savior Himself. How could we ignore that kind of invitation? It is issued with love and in our best interests, and ultimately, for our peace.

The scriptures are, of course, replete with testimony of the Savior and His works and teachings. If we don't take the time or make the effort to read these accounts, we are missing vital additives of our own testimony. I have appreciated the direction we have had with this challenge as we study the New Testament this year in Sunday School . In addition, I have focused my personal study, narrowing my efforts in my YW Personal Progress program to really investigate the Savior's life that I might Come unto Him.

For one of my Personal Progress projects, I had determined to read Jesus the Christ, by James E. Talmage. I imagined I could read it over the course of a few months, perhaps faster. What I didn't anticipate with that book was the parallel study and added insight it gave me as I read my weekly Sunday school lesson assignment, particularly throughout the four gospels. Almost eight months of reading later, I also learned that I needed to wade into that book, and let it soak into my mind and heart. There was a lot to understand, and more to comprehend. The Savior's recorded life was detailed and intricate and layered in ways that demanded more than just a surface reading of the New Testament. After reading that book, along with my Sunday School study, and regular prayers for increased understanding, I do literally 'stand all amazed at the love Jesus offers me'.

As I expanded this year's challenge for myself, I have also looked for attributes the Savior possesses that I can develop too. I started my study of those attributes in the Preach My Gospel manual. In studying there, I discovered added depth to the Savior's VIRTUE. And as YW leaders, we speak often about Virtue, and I know it means more than sexual purity and living a chaste life. The Savior's VIRTUE certainly included that, of course, but there is more to it. I really loved what Dr. Terrence D. Olsen, a BYU professor of Family Life, recently wrote: "To be a person of virtue is to be for others--to act in their best interests, and to have a heart of compassion and charity turned outwards. ...When we are being virtuous, we exhibit specific characteristics that are indicative of how we believe we should treat others. Our virtuous lived experience also reveals how our best interests would typically align with the best interest of others and thus contribute to a cohesive society." That is exactly what the Savior did. In my study, I've discovered I can learn to live and practice that kind of virtuous life too.

A few weeks ago I had the chance to substitute in our ward Relief Society class, for one of the Teaching for our Times lessons, based on several General Conference talks. Seeking the words of modern day prophets, apostles, and church leaders is another way I have tried to 'Come Unto Christ'. Elder C. Scott Grow taught of the "Miracle of the Atonement". In reading his talk, and studying the other messages as part of that lesson, I had my testimony of the reality of the Savior's Atonement reaffirmed, and a new dimension opened to me that answered a personal concern I had been dealing with for some time.

In my extended family, over that past five years, I have watched a bitter divorce and the subsequent deterioration and disintegration of once loving family ties. I have struggled to come to a place where I can forgive others for the hurt I have seen their choices cause me and my other family members. Elder Grow's talk spoke to my heart and shed new light on my struggle. I could actually give this emotional battle over to the Lord. He knows the pain I have felt and has felt that same pain before me. If I could just relinquish my hardened heart, He has the power to fill me with peace, and heal my aching enough to find forgiveness myself and offer that forgiveness to others, in turn, others who aren't even to the point to ask for it yet. I can be healed of my anger and bitterness. That sense of communion with Jesus Christ is, indeed, a miracle. And it took me much too long, too many years to Come Unto Him for it.

A reverenced humility comes as we seek to learn of, and eventually know the Savior for ourselves. That meekness or humility, sometimes described as becoming poor in spirit, is the bedrock foundation for our strength of testimony, our commitment to make and keep sacred covenants and, then, to go out and feed His sheep. Becoming humble is necessary, but becoming humble of our own accord, choosing to be humble and seek the Lord's words, will make us all the more prepared for what He holds next for us.

In General Conference in April 2006, Elder Jeffrey R. Holland said "My desire today is for all of us—not just those who are “poor in spirit” but all of us—to have more straightforward personal experience with the Savior’s example. Sometimes we seek heaven too obliquely, focusing on programs or history or the experience of others. Those are important but not as important as personal experience, true discipleship, and the strength that comes from experiencing firsthand the majesty of His touch."

I testify that our Stake Presidency is inspired; that this challenge to Become Zion is meant to ultimately lead us back to our Savior and Heavenly Father. The stake challenge has been given to us, not as one more thing to check off our list, but to gently nurture us and provide strategic opportunities to learn and grown, to guide and direct us to Come Unto Christ.

In the D&C section 19, verse 23, again, it says "Learn of me, and listen to my words; walk in the meekness of my Spirit, and you shall have peace in me." I testify of that peace that comes as you walk in His ways; ways that will eventually allow each of us to walk alongside Him.

I testify that this is the Gospel of Jesus Christ, on earth at last, restored through the Prophet Joseph Smith. It is true, and I love it. We are led today by a prophet of God, even Thomas S. Monson. We have scriptures to teach us of the peaceable things of the kingdom, to give us the words of Christ and to offer us the fullness of His Gospel. And with all the energy of my heart, I testify that Jesus is the Christ, the Son of God, the Redeemer of the world, and--yes, Sister Johnston, my personal Savior all at once. He lives and loves us. These things I know, beyond a shadow of a doubt. In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen

Video Sunday