HOLIDAY EATING TIPS

Here on the Circle, we are always looking for ways to help you, our dear readers, with problems or issues at hand. Of course, this being the Christmas Party Season, there are issues dealing with eating at these parties. I was send this cordial list of rules by Dear Friend Doris today and thought I would pass them along to you.

1. Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the Christmas spirit. In fact,if you see carrots, leave immediately. Go next door, where they're serving chocolate balls.
2. Drink as much eggnog as you can - And quickly. It's rare. You cannot find it any other time of year but now. So drink up! Who cares that it has 10,000 calories in every sip? It's not as if you're going to turn into an eggnog-alcoholic or something. It's a treat. Enjoy it! Have one for me … Have two! It's later than you think. It's Christmas!
3. If something comes with gravy, use it. That's the whole point of gravy. Gravy does not stand alone. Pour it on. Make a volcano out of your mashed potatoes. Fill it with gravy. Eat the volcano. Repeat.
4. As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they're made with skim milk or whole milk. If it's skim, pass. Why bother? It's like buying a sports car with an automatic transmission.
5. Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your eating. The whole point of going to a Christmas party is to eat other people's food for free. Lots of it. Hello?
6. Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Year's. You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do. This is the time for long naps, which you'll need after circling the buffet table while carrying a 10-pound plate of food and that vat of eggnog.
7. If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like frosted Christmas cookies in the shape and size of Santa, position yourself near them and don't budge. Have as many as you can before becoming the center of attention. They're like a beautiful pair of shoes. If you leave them behind, you're never going to see them again.
8. Same for pies. Apple, Pumpkin, Mincemeat. Have a slice of each. Or if you don't like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin. Always have three. When else do you get to have more than one dessert? Labor Day?
9. Did someone mention fruitcake? Granted, it's loaded with the mandatory celebratory calories, but avoid it at all cost. I mean, have some standards!
10. One final tip: If you don't feel terrible when you leave the party or get up from the table, you haven't been paying attention.

Re-read tips: Start over, but hurry, January is just around the corner.
Remember this motto to live by: "Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO!! What a ride!"

Ready or Not

I mailed our Christmas cards yesterday. Genius Golfer thinks I am one of a dwindling few. I send Christmas Family Newsletters with a card. That is my favorite part of Christmas time.

A lot of people in the past have dissed the Newsletter as a Christmas correspondence because they tend to be glowing, overly sweet, unrealistic representations of a family. You know what I mean, the child won the spelling bee, the tennis championship and the Nobel Prize. The family took a summer long vacation touring the Seven Wonders of the Ancient World. The father was promoted to chief wizard on the magical court and earned the title of Best Philanthropic Boss. The mom was delighted with a recognition by the Miss Universe organization for her work, at the grassroots level of course, to promote the literacy of Appalachian blondes. Even the puppy was top of his class at obedience school.

I am sure that we received crazy, unreal letters like that once in a while but the ones I remember were from people my parents knew. They would send a note telling about what their family was doing, how they spent their time, what they were proud of, and never--in all the years I lived at home and read my parents' Christmas cards--do I remember thinking "Well, that family is certainly full of itself!" I just loved hearing about them.

So, our family Christmas cards went out with a letter. I asked everyone here for their top 3 favorite or most memorable events from 2008 and wrote about them. Some I could have predicted--others, I was surprised myself.

And while I have this moment of your attention, may I respectfully request just a note of hello or a mention of how you and your family are doing if you send a card to us this year. I love to receive the photo cards, especially as I can then see how your little dearies are growing up and how tall they are, and how much they look like you as a child. But I would love them that much more with a note about all of you. It doesn't have to be a glowing two page report. But just as little memo.

OK. You are right. I really want the Family Christmas Newsletter from everyone I know. I read them. Every one. Not only that, I keep them. I have them in our family scrapbooks, along with the photos you send me and the cards sent to wish us joy in the new year. So, yeah. I want the letter.

I may be a dying breed on this one, but I'll die easier and, certainly, with more pleasure, having just read about your amazing and life changing family vacation to the Galapagos Islands, having won the Publisher's Clearinghouse Sweepstakes and celebrating your 75 wedding anniversary with your twelve Harvard graduates and current Oxford or Rhodes scholar children and the 45 awesome, hieroglyphic interpreting grandchildren.

An Apple a Day...

I heard a fascinating story on the radio yesterday morning and it has made me think all day long. What a brilliant research study. Yet, I am amazed that no one told me they were studying my life. Well, see for yourselves:

Hourglass shape may not be ideal for women
By Mary Richards (KSL radio)

A new study challenges the belief that an hourglass figure is the ideal body type for women.

What do you mean, IDEAL? That hourglass shape is requisite on a corset, for sure.

Science says that a woman with larger hips is more fertile. But a woman with a larger waist may be more able to take care of her children.

Yes, I can take care of my own children...but not any one else's, as seen with my Primary substitutions of late.

Elizabeth Cashdan, an anthropologist at the University of Utah, says the hormones that make women physically stronger, more competitive and better able to deal with stress also tend to redistribute fat from the hips to the waist.

Stronger? I don't know about that, but, well, thanks. I'm not sure about competitive either. Stress? What stress!? Yeah. The fat part is right.

A new University of Utah study found that women with more of an apple shape had more strength, assertiveness, and ability to cope with stress. Those women were more of the breadwinner in the family, too.

Here might be the tipping point of this argument. Assertiveness? Really? Do you see me sitting behind my computer, or walking to school venting my frustrations, but never confronting them? That doesn't seem really assertive, now, does it? Oh, and the breadwinner thing? Well, Genius Golfer assures me he is headed back to work after the new year. Please don't put that one on me at the moment.

But the downsides are that having too thick a waist can mean health problems and lower fertility.

Health problems? Like, you mean, finding jean that fit and don't slide off? Or looking for a swim suit that doesn't conjure up Moby Dick images? And, really, I have two children because I thought I was going to be a mental case. Who knows? Maybe I already am. No one from this study asked me about that little detail when they put together their findings.

You know what they say: One bad apple spoils the whole bunch.

It's Beginning to Look A Lot Like...

We had or Relief Society Christmas program last night. It was very nice, and having been the one to put those things on in the past, I know how nerve wracking they can be. But the musical presentations were lovely and the narrators got through all the 6 pages of readings from the Bible.


I am always happy to be a narrator. Last night wasn't any different. I just felt too rushed when she asked me to do it and rather than being given the choice to do it or not, it was already assumed that I would, so I was handed the script and then invited to read it. I don't believe that was the way she meant to do that, but it is just her way. The fact that she, personally, may rub me wrong at times, doesn't take away from the effort she is making to do something nice.


The effect of the program was good one, despite my initial iciness. We read the Nativity story from the book of Luke (my part) and the prophesies of the coming of Christ from the other scriptures. How many times do you read "A decree went out from Caesar Augustus..." and you already feel better? Our reading was interspersed by musical numbers that filled the room with the Christmas spirit. The young women in our ward participated too, and did a fine job.


The Girl and her younger YW cohorts were running a nursery program for the wee ones that hard to come with their moms in order to help the moms of little ones get there. The girls did a great job too and really thought about what they could do to keep the Christmas spirit for little people they had charge of last night.



I suppose, like the Grinch, my "heart was growing two sizes" last night. I feel ready to hear the music of the season, and feel the spirit it brings. I had previewed 5 songs of Christmas--in previewing Genius Golfer's Light Show Extravaganza--but I wasn't ready for Christmas music yet. I wasn't really ready for Christmas time yet. I was finishing checking off my Christmas shopping list and getting things done, but without the proper perspective. I was simply going through the motions and checking it off. But now I am ready. I am ready to put my heart into Christmas and ready to feel it grow from too shriveled and tight and fussbudgety to a heart filled and light and open to what the Season means.

Reason Number 14

Did you hear this survey that was splashed all over the news last night? High school aged teens were surveyed on their own ETHICS. And their ideas of ethical behavior was messed up.

The Josephson Institute in LA published the 2008 Report Card of Ethics of American Youth. see:http://www.google.com/hostednews/afp/article/ALeqM5heO49If8cVynFgMZMsjn0jX52ywg Very disturbing. Almost 30, 000 kids were surveyed and while 93% claimed they were satisfied with their own personal ethics:

• 78% of public school kids (while 83% of private and parochial school kids) admitted to lying to their parents about "something significant".
• 64% admitted to cheating on a test at school and 38% said they'd done that more than once.
• 30% admitted to stealing something from a store in the last year, with boys slightly higher here with 35% copping to that while only 26% of girls did.

This got under my skin yesterday. Honesty used to be a hallmark of character. Apparently now, it is missing in action. How can these kids surveyed settle themselves with this type of admitted behavior and still think they are "satisfied with their personal ethics"??

What is wrong with us as parents? Is this what our behavior is teaching our kids? Are we modeling for them what we expect, or is it more along the lines of what we can get away with? I find it all very sad.

I think I have stressed INTEGRITY with my kids from the time they were little. We try to be very open with them, so that when mistakes are made--and they are by all of us--we can talk about it and make changes to improve. That is the whole point of the Gospel, isn't it? We learn, we try, we make mistakes, we change, we get better. And Christ allows us to improve.

Honesty is one of the Big 10 Commandments, right? So why does it sound so off the radar for these kids? It's too bad society has fallen so far from living the "Big 10" that the concepts are beginning be lost on our youth. There will be worse to come from these newbies with this kind of foundation.

My thought here is that this is just another reason to love the Gospel, to live the Gospel and to share the Gospel. I love that I can choose to live an ethically straight life and have no guilt about it--now or when I'll face God someday. I'll just have to focus of the benefits I have with the Gospel in my life and emphasize the values it teaches. And be grateful for that.

Flipping the Page

Are you surprised too when it comes time to flip the page of the calendar? My life's schedule is on my calendar--and if it doesn't get written down, I am bound to forget to do it--so I look at the calendar quite a lot.

Still, I am surprised when the month ends and I am found flipping the page for the new month again. It is like it sneaks up on me. Even though I know that the month is ending; it really shouldn't be a surprise.

This month snuck up faster than most. Perhaps it was the very long weekend for Thanksgiving that ended the month that makes it feel like that. Maybe, like my mom has always said, the time goes faster as you get older. I'm not happy with the inferred implication with that theory, but the time does seem to go faster.

I always feel bad for the folks with birthdays on my calendar that fall on the first of the month. I don't see them until I flip the page and then it is too late to send a card that will be on time. Today is newlywed nephew Travis' birthday. His birthday card went into the mail last night, about 9 PM at the post office, so it will not reach him on his birthday but probably the day after. I'm sure he will survive the oversight, but I'll think about it all day, and chastize myself.

When I do get to flip the page on the calendar, I enjoy the first moment of the clean slate feeling as I look and see almost nothing on it. Then as soon as I can enjoy that moment, things begin to fill in the boxes and the month is soon scheduled more crazily than the last. December is notorious for that. This week alone, already today, has only one empty square--and it is on Saturday, so even that won't last.

Not that everything on it is unenjoyable, or unrewarding; just busy. But "busy" on a calendar keeps me from being quite so "scattered" in person. So, I'll be mindful of the calendar and the commitments that I have there this week. I probably should calendar some "stop and smell the roses" time to get through this holiday month and still enjoy it. Well, that and not try to wander into any store parking lots. Good luck with that.

A Change in Guests....

Last week I professed to you all that I was looking forward to spending the long weekend with my friends the Bennett sisters, Mr. and Mrs. Darcy, and a handful of other delightful British characters via DVD. Sadly, the list of visitors was altered slightly, as Genius Golfer and I spent many evenings with guests of his choosing. Namely Tommy Boy, the Wedding Singer and Fred Claus. We also spent our Saturday evening with a Mr. Gibson, in the form of The Patriot. Happily, I was able to catch up with my dear friend, Miss Emma Woodhouse and just as Mr. Darcy and his Elizabeth were set to spend the afternoon with me, it is now time to collect our children from their cousins camp at Grandmama's. Alas, my British friends will have to wait. Like Scarlett would say, "Tomorrow is another day."