#52 Stories--Story #4

If you had to pinpoint 3 main values that your parents tried to instill in you, what would they be?

There are many values my parents tried to instill in me--some more successfully than other, I'm sure--but if I had to narrow the focus to only three I think I would include: hard work, responsibility, and honesty.

HARD WORK
More time than I care to remember my mom would quote the old TV character, Maynard G Krebs, "WORK?!"  Like that was a four lettered word to us.  By doing this she was reiterating, gently, that we needed to learn to like working--or at the least appreciate the outcome working hard can bring.

My parents are two of the hardest working people I know. They very rarely slow down, and even the idea of "relaxing" tot hem is just work in another form. 

While my dad worked for Snap On Tools while I was a little girl, first as a dealer then slowly into middle management that I really don't think he liked much, he worked hard, long hours and sometimes in grueling situations. Not everyone gets along with their boss, I knew that, but dad kept at it.  Some bosses were easier to work with than others.  Midway through my high school career my dad took a financial risk, and bought a local automotive shop in town. Long hours really came with this venture.  And mom was right there with him. They made the shop successful together and with combined effort, toil, blood, sweat and tears, I'm very sure.

My mom was always working. Housework, yard work, gardening, canning, caring for my grandparents, getting my sister and I to and from our activities, participating with us in those activities, and working in her callings over the years. The only thing I even remember her doing for herself was a painting class when I was young.  She took an oil painting class--she was really quite good at it too--but she worked at that too. Then she used the paintings she created as Christmas or birthday gifts for family and friends.

When dad wasn't working, he was still working at the house.  He has always has a project--a race car, a vehicle restoration, a side job--going on at the shop at home. He helped my mom with stuff around the house too. Building or dismantling, repairing or reinforcing or improving. He used his skills to help us--building chicken coops or goat houses or sheep barns or rabbit hutches.  He repaired fences, water pumps, drainage issues, driveways, swimming pool filters & heaters.  There was always something that needed repair, and he figured out a way to do it.

They passed that work ethic to us. I got my first job when I was only 15.  I worked the summer I turned 15 as a lifeguard/babysitter for the local Goldsmith Seed company for the employee's kids for the summer.  I couldn't drive myself there yet, but they made sure I was there ready to work every day. I knew what was expected of me and I learned to find pleasure in a job well done. When I was 16 and could get a "real" job I applied to work at the fabric store in town, Beverly's Fabrics. I quickly was left to close up on weekends and I knew my manager counted on me to do a full shift's work.

RESPONSIBILITY
The hard work spills into this value too.  Once, while I was working at Beverly's, I was scheduled to go into work on a Saturday about 2pm.  But I had gone with friends to the beach that day. I "called in sick" to Marilyn, my manager, from a pay phone somewhere in Watsonville. I am pretty sure she could tell that I was probably faking--and just didn't want to work that day.  She said nothing about and told me to feel better. I stayed at the beach with friends. Later, mom found out.  They always do--who was I kidding?!?  I certainly heard about the disappointment I caused and the lack of trust I displayed and the disappointment, did I mention that?

OK, lesson learned.  Be responsible.

HONESTY
Telling a lie, not living up to your word, breaking a promise--these are all things I was taught early and often to avoid.  My parents' word is their bond.  A handshake from them was a solid as a contract. Telling the truth was imperative. I always knew I could trust my parents. I saw that trust in action as they worked with people, as they ran their business, and they dealt with our family and friends. In fact, my mom wasn't ever even very good at tricks or surprises a lot of time if it meant that she had to tell us something other than the full truth and nothing but the truth.  Once in a while she could pull that off, but not very much.  I love that about her.  I always know she is telling me the truth and I always know I can trust her.

These three values all work together in a world where worth ethic has vaporized, responsibility is shirked as often as possible and honesty is hardly ever heard, to quote Billy Joel. My parents taught me these as much with their examples and behaviors as they did with their words.  For that I will always be grateful.