Mama Got a New Pair of Shoes

I picked up my previous exercise shoes almost a year ago. I broke them in gently and prepped for trek in them. They were duplicates--in every way but cleanliness, where the newer ones excelled--to my first pair of New Balance running shoes. They were comfortable and useful. My nearly 40 miles trek experience wasn't filled with shoe-related disasters, thanks to my reliable old shoes.

Post-Trek and Post-Pool-Closing I began walking, then running/jogging/walking for exercise. I have been doing pretty well. I average about 2.5-3 miles each day. I walk with kids to school and leave them at the corner (safely on the same side of the street as the school) and I continue on my cardio-building way up the hill and around our stake. I see friends bringing kids to school--some who wave and honk and some who attempt to scare me by pretending they are going to run me down. Good times, there, my friends.

The past week or so I have felt increasing pain mid-way up my shins on either side of the bone but not always through the calf muscle. It is a strange place for pain--not the cramp feeling in the calf and not the shin-splint feeling on the bone. I worried I was dealing with stress fractures in my legs. I didn't have time for that. When I mentioned it to a running friend (like a real runner, like a half-marathon type of runner) she asked me how old my shoes were. Huh. I hadn't thought of that.

Sure enough, the new shoes are already aiding my sore lower legs and the fresh cushion on my heel even makes my ankles feel good. Now that is saying something.

I guess I have learned that unlike my goal to keep things as long as I can, maintaining their function without completely wearing something out (does this sound familiar, mom?) this may only work with garage door openers and kitchen appliances. I realize I am hard on things around here and I expect them to last as long as I take care of them. However, my body will wear out if I don't take better care of it, and new shoes occasionally need to become part of that regular maintenance. So I'd better budget in leg-maintenance equipment into my annual budget. New shoes are still cheaper than broken legs.

Self-Indictment

I nearly killed Dear Friend Tammy yesterday. It was my regular day to spend with her. Her girls were home due to the fall break, so Mr. Rick left for work just before I got there. She had just chosen a movie and I went through the standard schedule with her.

About 15 minutes before my shift usually ends, her throat became filled with mucus and secretions. She was having a hard time talking, much less swallowing, and soon her breathing was also affected. I hadn't been trained on how to use the "cough machine" that Mr. Rick has there for her to help in just this situation.

As I asked her if I should just use it--having watched him do it once before--her eyes looked terrified. I was suddenly aware that if I did it wrong I might puff the mucus down into her lungs before the sucking action pulled it all out.

I called Mr. Rick, thinking he could walk me through over the phone so I wouldn't hurt her more. It went right to voice mail.

I called the nurse's aid, Ashley, who has been there for over a year and is a delight. Right to voice mail.

I called the Home Health/Hospice number to page the nurse, Colleen, but that has to go through a dispatcher and then they notify Colleen, who is out on her rounds. When Colleen finally called back she was on her way, but still 15 minutes away.

I began to think that Tammy would suffocate or drown in her own secretions before any help arrived. I was so afraid.

Just when I thought I'd done it for sure, Tammy's neighbor, Charlene, came in. She was coming to relieve me and take the next shift. Luckily she had just been trained on this cough machine the night before. Hallelujah! We were safe.

She started right in and I grabbed tissue after tissue to wipe the mucus out of Tammy mouth. It was such a blessing she was there when she was. Normally the other neighbor, Dorothy, is on duty after me--but she had surgery on Tuesday and wasn't coming over. Luckily, Charlene had just been trained on the machine.

When Colleen, the RN, showed up things were fairly under control. She told us that Tammy's care is now at ICU level and that we did fine, all things considered. She assured me that I called the right people and Charlene had perfect timing.

I felt so awful. I am not sure I have it in me to stick this out. I don't think I can bear to have her pass on my watch--as much as I don't want her to suffer. I will never forget the look in her eyes as she felt like she was drowning or suffocating. It was horrible.

Can I? Why? What?

How many question can one child ask you in a row? Have you ever counted? Do you count the ones he asks twice because he wasn't listening when you answered the first time? Do your children rephrase the question with different words but the same meaning for you? Several times? How long can you listen to these questions in one morning? Does it make you want to shoot yourself? Or them? Does any of this sound familiar? Did you think too that this behavior would go away by the time they got to junior high?

It's A Friday Kind of Wednesday

Today is the end of a very short week of school for the kids and for me. I have vowed to put off PTA for the whole weekend. They are putting off school without any problem, and I'm following their example here.

It is our district's "fall break" which means we've been in school not quite two months and we need a vacation. That is good enough for me. My only complaint is that the end of term is NEXT Friday, so the kids still have work, assignments, quizzes and papers that they will have to turn in. Had this been the end of term weekend as well, we might have been able to run away farther from home for the break.

We almost did, in fact. We were going to go to Southern California, the Magical Kingdom, Childhood Mecca for the long weekend. We had planned on meeting our good friends, Jordan and Jen and their littler kids and help they shasse around the park. But The Girl couldn't miss swim practice, and The Boy had assignments due, and they both had to have their work they would have missed turn in prior to leaving on a family trip--because their term grades depended on that.

Oh well. We grow up and The Girl is working on her "permanent record" and transcript for colleges to see now. The Boy is becoming well adjusted to his 8 classes and multiple assignments and teachers and homework. I figured, as fun as that trip would have been, we'd better be safe rather than sorry.

Yes, I am a party pooper. Every party has one, that is why I am invited. I know. I have no problem knowing this about me. It is an added bonus point of my "Meanest Mom in the World" tally. I'm already way ahead.

So, we are going to relax and veg out this long weekend at home--maybe run up tot he Gardner Village for the day, maybe head up to Park City and play. It is wide open so far. Just the way a weekend should be.

Stop Bringing Me Down, Man

I'd first like to apologize for my written pity party post yesterday. Things are not as bad as I made them sound--or even as bad as I meant for them to sound. A lot of my whining comes from things I signed myself up for--like Dear Friend Micheale reminds me "I'm a volunteer". So true. So I am sorry to dump on each of you in this forum.

The Boy's stitches came out yesterday morning and the doctor said his incision is healing beautifully. The nurse put steri-stips on the incision and they will stay on until they slowly wear themselves off. The Boy, much to his disappointment, can fully wash his hair and face every day without disrupting the wound. Good thing, is all I can say there.

The Girl is still enjoying swim practice, but prefers to actually swim. They only have access to the pool every other day (on "A" days) so on "B" days, at least so far this week, they are running and doing dry land workouts. They are no so fun for her. But she is getting to know the high school and the high school kids. As a freshman from the junior high, that might ease her transition next fall. Not that she will need much easing. She is mostly easy going in general. Lucky for me.

I'm preparing an assignment for our Stake Leadership meeting coming up next week. I have the spiritual thought in our opening exercises with the Relief Society and Primary sisters and then a small part in our Young Women specific section. That is my goal today, as I spent all of yesterday working on PTA. I need a break from that side of my life and the concentration on the Spirit might do me some good.

Genius Golfer is putting in long hours at his new job--new being about two weeks or so old. He seems to like it, but the hours are not my favorite. At least he HAS a job, I know. I was just spoiled when he was only 5 minutes away. Now he is almost an hour on the freeway each direction. I miss having him home for dinner and to say morning family prayer with us. He is building a department and a IT system from scratch, essentially, so there will be long hours for him for a while. SO long as he is happy, I can learn to adjust.

It is Tuesday, and while I still have many things on my "To-Do" list, I recognize I am blessed just to have the flexibility to do all the things I can do. I am blessed to be healthy enough to do them. I am blessed to have the time to do many things other ladies don't have time to do. Some day I'll have time to do other things I think I want to do, but in the meantime I am counting my blessings today and trying to enjoy the day as it unfolds. Thanks for listening, even when the whine gets turned up too loud.

Supposed To Do

Last night as I was sleeping I must have dreamt about all the things on my "to do" list this week. It was an unsettled night. That list gets longer as the weeks go on, and yet there is very seldom a spot to write something I want to do just for me.

I exercise because I am supposed to do it, according to my doctor.

I do laundry because I am supposed to do it, or else what would my family be wearing?

I make menus and do grocery shopping because I am supposed to, else what is my family to eat?

I take kids hither and yon because I am supposed to, or how will they get there?

I visit ten different schools' PTA boards this month, because I am suppose to for my job in PTA this year.

I go visiting teaching, because I am suppose to and I feel guilty if I don't.

You know, maybe the guilt all these things induces in me is why I keep doing them month after month. That cannot be the correct motivation for getting things done, however. I just hope I get credit for doing what I am supposed to do, regardless of my attitude about each thing. That may well be my only hope.

Video Sunday

You have probably seen this before, but it is good enough to watch again. We certainly can each do better after watching this story.