Life Goes On

In an attempt to fan the eeyore-like little black cloud away today, I'd like to tell you about our surprise at the Swim Team Awards Banquet.

Would it help you if I sing? ♫ Ob-la-dee, ob-la-dah, life goes on, la-la-la-la, life goes on. ♫ That helps me.

As you know, The Girl has been swimming on the HS team this year. She is a freshman, but our HS is only a 3 year school, as is the Junior High. So the ninth graders are housed at the junior high, but can compete (with help form many moms to cart them wherever they need to go) with the high school.

Well, as the evening went along Thursday night, we were pleasantly surprised that The Girl had done well enough all season to letter, on the varsity level, as a freshman! She earned a letterman's pin, in fact. I wasn't sure how that would work--especially as, in my own personal high school experience, I only ever lettered in choir. (I'll wait for laughter here.)

When the coach got up to award some special coach's awards, The Girl was named Women's team Rookie of the Year! Then the senior girls who were the team captains this year got up to present their captain's awards. The Girl received the "Only Freshman Girl to Ever Make Lane One in Practice" award.

Lanes at practice are numbered, with the fastest kids swimming in the lower numbered lanes. Kids who are slow, messing around, or goofing off end up in lanes 6, 7, or 8. For most of the season, The Girl was swimming in lane 2 or 3, then slowly improved to lane one where she was swimming with the fastest kids--senior boys, many of them--on the team.

We were very proud of her. She loves to swim, but seems to be liking this off season as well. That makes me very happy, as that shows she is fairly well rounded socially, emotionally, physically, academically. That has always been my goal for her: a healthy, happy girl.

Gut Wrenched

After Dear Friend Tammy's death on Tuesday, I was consigned to an Eeyore-kind of week. You know, the one where the little black cloud hangs over your head and you just grit your teeth and get through it?

Yesterday I sat through a PTA meeting that lasted into the early afternoon, then came home and got on the computer again. It felt like a kick to my already sore guts. My other friend from growing up in Garlic-ville, Jennifer, had passed away that morning.

Jenn suffered seven years with GIST, a rare stomach cancer. She lived seven years with this painful situation. She tried many experimental drug trials over the years. The most recent one was helping her only to be pulled and discontinued due to lousy side effects in others. Her sweet husband, David, said two weeks ago she was feeling strong enough to go to church. But Wednesday night about 10 PM she took a turn for the worse and was gone by 7 AM Thursday morning.

Like Tammy, Jennifer is a wife, mother, sister, daughter, friend. Jenn's two boys are young--Cub Scout age or so. While she lived in Southern California, and I didn't see her regularly, I feel my heart sinking with heaviness at her loss. She is only a year older than I am. We grew up in the same city, same ward. She was a wonderful example of the power of positivity. And like Tammy, she is gone too soon because of a disease that has no cure.

It makes me angry that these two friends are gone from their families. But I find that anger softened a bit by the understanding I have that they will see their loved ones again; That these two wonderful women knew Jesus Christ, and His gospel and were covenant women of God. I also feel gratitude that their suffering is over, and they are free of pain and anguish that comes with a body wracked with such illnesses.

Give me a little while. I'll bounce back. But I will miss these good women in my life. And I look forward to seeing them again. What a reunion that will be!

A Valentine's Surprise

Sunday night I came home from a visit to a Young Women's activity to find a delightful surprise. I found this hanky, note and a cute wedge shaped box with treats. The best part? It was allegedly from Mr. Edward Ferrars.

You know Edward. No, not that vampire, Edward. This one is the subdued gentleman, Edward Ferrars, from Jane Austen's Sense and Sensibility. It is one of my favorite novels. And Hugh Grant played the character opposite Emma Thompson in the 1995 film version. I can't complain about that either.

This was a wonderfully creative surprise left on my porch by a dear friend. The trouble is, I haven't identified that dear friend yet. I am lucky to have several friends who are as devoted Jane Austen fans as I am. So far no one is 'fessing up. If I can't nail down this giver of such a delightful gift soon, I will be forced to just accept the anonymity of it and enjoy the idea of a clever, Jane Austen-loving friend out there who cares enough for me to do something like this on Valentine's Day.

That sounds pretty good to me.

Released

Yesterday, my Dear Friend Tammy passed away after a nearly three year battle with ALS. This is a horrific disease. It leaves the victim mentally alert in a broken shell of a body. Slowly it takes away their independence, vitality, and comfort.

For about two years I have been blessed to spend a day nearly every week in service to Tammy and her family. At first it was to help with housework...laundry, dishes, vacuuming. Then I was needed to stay a little closer to Tammy in case she needed something. I still did laundry and dishes, when she would fall asleep. Soon, I needed to be by her side to help her with even the simplest of things--an eyebrow itching, hair in her eyes, legs that were getting stiff and needed to be straightened or bent. More recently, I was using the cough-assist and the suction machines to help relieve her of the mucus she could no longer cough up or swallow herself. I fed her through her feeding tube. I gave her meds as she needed. I still brushed the hair out of her face and scratched an eyebrow or shifted the position o her legs or arms. But mostly I witnessed her great patience, her faith and her hope for something better.

This last week was excruciating to watch. Her ability to speak and be understood had finally been taken. Without understanding what she needed me to do, I was helpless to relieve her discomfort and felt like another burden for her to deal with along side this wretched disease.

She went to very great lengths to plan special things for each of her three girls and her husband for Valentine's Day. She knew the end of her life was coming, and the last efforts she made were to leave them all with a physical token and momento that would express her unending love for them even after she was gone.

Tuesday morning she was able to be medicated sufficiently to peacefully just drift away.

I am grateful for the chance I had to truly serve my friend. It wasn't always fun, or convenient, but that isn't how service comes to us.

Twenty year ago we became friends--as her husband and Genius Golfer were best friends in high school. I baby sat for her after her second daughter was born and she went back to work. We have traveled and vacationed together as couples. We have bar-b-qued on holidays together as families. Now, a tthe end of her life, I have served her as my friend.

I will miss her, but know that she is finally rid of this awful diseased body. I also know that she is released from the distress she felt being a burden to her family. I am sure she is smiling on her girls, even now, and preparing for a time when they can be together again.

I ♥ The Olympics

I watched the end of the pairs figure skating this morning. WE taped it last night, and I didn't want to write until I saw the end.

Have I mentioned that I love the Olympics?

What is it about athletes devoted or crazy enough to spend 18 years together pursuing a dream of Olympic gold medals that gets me right there?! This Chinese couple--now married--were competing together before some of the women in the other pairs were born! Holy cow. That is dedication to your sport.

I love the stories the NBC guys come up with--the Canadian skier with the older brother who has cerebral palsy. Or the US Snowboarder who missed winning the gold in Torino because she got a little ahead of herself in celebrating a win before her run was over.

It is like 16 days of good, old-fashioned Kodak commercials. Now that is some good stuff.

A Valentine Gone Bad

I've dug deep into my own embarrassment cellar today to pull out a Valentine's Day disaster. My freshman year of high school I wrote a love letter to someone who was a senior. Oh, how I crushed on him. Luckily, I had a moment of awareness and thought again before sending this little ditty to him. If I had, I'd have never lived it down.

To celebrate the holiday of love, or as Dear Friend Chris calls it, National Single Awareness Day, I thought I would expose myself for the floundering, hopelessly romantic teen that I was. This is, in reality, to make any of you feel better about whatever situation may have been your worst Valentine's Day by comparing it to my mortifying writings. It could have been worse. You could have written and sent this to someone. So, here goes:

For a mere moment, let me confess my undying love which my heart has for you. Allow me to reveal the desire I have within me for your arms to bind me in your grasp forever, never to let me go from your side. For, you see, the pain has gathered deep within me that you know not of my truest feelings for so long. Now I shall never keep my love for you captive in my soul again. It would be gratifying to my heart that you should know of my love and appreciation, and possibly someday return it to me. Won't you please devote yourself to me on this celebrated day of love, if only for a day? For you shall always be considered mine, if only in my eyes.
With the deepest affection,

It is any wonder I grew up to love Jane Austen's writing?