We had a disheartening experience this week that I feel I need to write about. If you are uncomfortable with this topic, I'm sorry in advance.
The Boy disclosed to Genius Golfer this week that he has a "friend" who happens to be a girl, who sent him a picture of her naked boobs to his phone. It made him uncomfortable and he wasn't sure what to do.
At least he told GG about it. And, at least so far as I can comprehend, he didn't request this photo from her. But still.
I saw a sign recently that said something along the lines of "One of the best things bout being in my 40s is that we did all our stupid stuff before the Internet." True. I know that my generation wasn't perfect, by any stretch of the imagination. But there is much less proof of it now.
These kids today have electronic shadows that will follow them forever. And when they compound this fact with stupid choice too, it only makes it worse.
I feel bad for my son, who was confused, and probably a little excited--he's a boy, after all--then guilt for feeling that, and now he is ashamed. And it wasn't his initial action that started it all. But he is dealing with the fall out. I hope he is learning too. We have had to talk to him about Child Pornography and having that on his phone makes him culpable too.
I feel really bad for this girl though. She got the idea that she will get attention--that she obviously craves--with this kind of behavior. the problem is that this is not the kind of attention she ultimately wants. I'm sure she is some Dad's "Baby Girl" and some Grandma's "Little Darling" and even someone's "Big Sister", but she has also made her self an object for other people to consume. And that is sad.
How will she ever feel the real value she hold innately as a daughter of God? How will she find the self-worth to recognize her own potential? How will she understand that she is, of herself, worth real love and devotion someday?
I guess a part of me will always be a YW leader. This girl and her action break my heart. And at the same time, make me want to call her mom. It is a hard lesson, but a necessary one--for both the sender and the recipient.
Showing posts with label sex ed. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sex ed. Show all posts
Saturday, June 22, 2013
Saturday, February 16, 2013
The Hill Is In Session & This Is My First Gripe
Our state legislature is in session at the moment. So far, it is too early to get a real sense of what stupidity will distract the legislators from their chore there. But I did read one article about a proposed "Sex Ed Bill for Parents".
Utah's public schools have a fine line to toe when it comes to sex education or any kind. As it is now, the instant a student is in a junior health class or high school human biology or even anatomy class a note is sent home that demands the parent(s) sign for permission to include the student in the discussion where body parts, organs or biological systems are discussed. This is the "opt-in" system of parental permission.
That means that if no note comes back, the student is not allowed to sit in on the class, its discussion or any information that will be covered in the class during this portion. Crazy, I know. But the hyper-active parents who still believe that their little precious ones will only learn what they are taught in Family Home Evening about human sexuality really believe that their kids don't talk to the friend, search the internet or read the bathroom walls of the junior high. The "opt-in" system is a compromise for them.
With that kind of parental responsibility then for the parents to be the primary teachers of this sort of knowledge, the legislature in their wisdom has proposed a bill that will require parents to take an online course about how to teach human sexuality to their students. The problem I see with this is two fold. One, how many of these parents who are terrified their children might learn about human sexuality in class will actually want to search online resources for the information--proven, scientific and correct--to use at home? I am guessing not many. These are the same kind of families that are worried that they could accidentally use the internet for homework research and pull up pornography. In their homes! Overworried and undereducated parents have this issue, at least in my mind.
Two, the resources that will be provided online are already available to parents locally at their neighborhood school--junior highs and high schools make the same resources available to parents any time they want to check them out for more information to help them supplement or teach directly rather than let them in the class that will be doing the same thing. How many of them have ever been checked out by parents with the system we have in place now? None. Zero. Nada. To my understanding, and the 13 years I have volunteered in the public schools, I have yet to hear of any parents coming to use the resources already available in their neighborhood.
What makes the Legislature think that this new "rule" will help these poor kids ever understand anything they might have to learn from their friends, the bathroom walls or--heaven forbid--on their own the hard way? These law makers need to do a little work in the public schools to see what is already happening and let go of the very small, but very vocal, minority of parents that want to keep their heads in the sand. Those who believe that if they shelter their little darlings they will be safer than if we give them knowledge. Ralph Waldo Emerson said " Knowledge is the antidote to fear." Maybe we ought to start subscribing that kind of thinking with our children. Give them correct knowledge and then infuse it with the principles and values we have as a family. That is the best hope our kids have to navigate this disturbed and wicked world.
And that kind of balanced thinking will never come from the legislature. Not that this is a surprise.
Utah's public schools have a fine line to toe when it comes to sex education or any kind. As it is now, the instant a student is in a junior health class or high school human biology or even anatomy class a note is sent home that demands the parent(s) sign for permission to include the student in the discussion where body parts, organs or biological systems are discussed. This is the "opt-in" system of parental permission.
That means that if no note comes back, the student is not allowed to sit in on the class, its discussion or any information that will be covered in the class during this portion. Crazy, I know. But the hyper-active parents who still believe that their little precious ones will only learn what they are taught in Family Home Evening about human sexuality really believe that their kids don't talk to the friend, search the internet or read the bathroom walls of the junior high. The "opt-in" system is a compromise for them.
With that kind of parental responsibility then for the parents to be the primary teachers of this sort of knowledge, the legislature in their wisdom has proposed a bill that will require parents to take an online course about how to teach human sexuality to their students. The problem I see with this is two fold. One, how many of these parents who are terrified their children might learn about human sexuality in class will actually want to search online resources for the information--proven, scientific and correct--to use at home? I am guessing not many. These are the same kind of families that are worried that they could accidentally use the internet for homework research and pull up pornography. In their homes! Overworried and undereducated parents have this issue, at least in my mind.
Two, the resources that will be provided online are already available to parents locally at their neighborhood school--junior highs and high schools make the same resources available to parents any time they want to check them out for more information to help them supplement or teach directly rather than let them in the class that will be doing the same thing. How many of them have ever been checked out by parents with the system we have in place now? None. Zero. Nada. To my understanding, and the 13 years I have volunteered in the public schools, I have yet to hear of any parents coming to use the resources already available in their neighborhood.
What makes the Legislature think that this new "rule" will help these poor kids ever understand anything they might have to learn from their friends, the bathroom walls or--heaven forbid--on their own the hard way? These law makers need to do a little work in the public schools to see what is already happening and let go of the very small, but very vocal, minority of parents that want to keep their heads in the sand. Those who believe that if they shelter their little darlings they will be safer than if we give them knowledge. Ralph Waldo Emerson said " Knowledge is the antidote to fear." Maybe we ought to start subscribing that kind of thinking with our children. Give them correct knowledge and then infuse it with the principles and values we have as a family. That is the best hope our kids have to navigate this disturbed and wicked world.
And that kind of balanced thinking will never come from the legislature. Not that this is a surprise.
Friday, March 9, 2012
Really?!
Our state legislature wrapped up their annual session last night. And I have had a couple of heartburn inducing bills that I have tried to keep on my radar while they worked. Now the legislature's part if over and the Governor is holding the bag at this point with bills waiting to be signed into law.
I just want to share my complete disappointment about one bill. Overwhelmingly, legislators in both houses passed a bill shifting our public education's handling of Sex Ed in health or biology to an "abstinence only" curriculum. This bill is now sitting on the governor's desk waiting for a signature or a veto.
The thing is, while abstinence is the option I personally would prefer for our kids for their sexual behavior, this bill disallows any parental choice to "opt in" or the choice to give permission for our kids to learn from an educated and caring teacher (as it is now). A student requires a permission slip to sit in a class period to hear any of this information--which is currently even more limited than I would prefer--at this point. This new bill removes that opt in or permission slip choice. The proposed change would not let teachers answer ANY question from a student that went outside the abstinence-only language.
Where will kids go for information then? You know they won't just stop looking for what they feel they need to know. The Internet? Their friends? Yeah, sure. I worry about that. A lot.
I believe strongly that, as a parent, it is my duty and privilege to teach my kids the values and morals I believe as right. I feel bound to teach them how to stay safe, physically and emotionally, when it comes to human sexuality along with everything else I do to try to keep them safe. Having a teacher back up my efforts to instruct my kids with just the facts, is a great way to tie the medical information to the morality I want to instill in them on this topic. Now the government thinks they know better what to do for my kids. That is wrong. In every way.
Here is a LINK in a local newspaper from one of the opposing representative, who presents a thoughtful and caring opinion. I agree with her. How I wish other elected officials thought more about the "we the people" they represent than their own re-electability or the extremists who puff them up throughout the session as lobbyists.
My faith in the system significantly dims between this kind of extremist agenda-driven legislation and the vicious, attacking, slanderous primary election propaganda going on in our country. And that is disturbing to me. America was designed for better than this.
I just want to share my complete disappointment about one bill. Overwhelmingly, legislators in both houses passed a bill shifting our public education's handling of Sex Ed in health or biology to an "abstinence only" curriculum. This bill is now sitting on the governor's desk waiting for a signature or a veto.
The thing is, while abstinence is the option I personally would prefer for our kids for their sexual behavior, this bill disallows any parental choice to "opt in" or the choice to give permission for our kids to learn from an educated and caring teacher (as it is now). A student requires a permission slip to sit in a class period to hear any of this information--which is currently even more limited than I would prefer--at this point. This new bill removes that opt in or permission slip choice. The proposed change would not let teachers answer ANY question from a student that went outside the abstinence-only language.
Where will kids go for information then? You know they won't just stop looking for what they feel they need to know. The Internet? Their friends? Yeah, sure. I worry about that. A lot.
I believe strongly that, as a parent, it is my duty and privilege to teach my kids the values and morals I believe as right. I feel bound to teach them how to stay safe, physically and emotionally, when it comes to human sexuality along with everything else I do to try to keep them safe. Having a teacher back up my efforts to instruct my kids with just the facts, is a great way to tie the medical information to the morality I want to instill in them on this topic. Now the government thinks they know better what to do for my kids. That is wrong. In every way.
Here is a LINK in a local newspaper from one of the opposing representative, who presents a thoughtful and caring opinion. I agree with her. How I wish other elected officials thought more about the "we the people" they represent than their own re-electability or the extremists who puff them up throughout the session as lobbyists.
My faith in the system significantly dims between this kind of extremist agenda-driven legislation and the vicious, attacking, slanderous primary election propaganda going on in our country. And that is disturbing to me. America was designed for better than this.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
