Repercussions

After last Friday's tragic elementary school shooting, I just didn't have the heart to write.  It made the weekend dark and dreary, and today's morning Admin meeting at our local high school was also still reeling.

Why does this sort of thing happen?  Why does it keep happening?  What is wrong with people?  And how soon can the Second Coming actually happen?  I can't take this kind of news anymore.

I recall hearing the news about the Columbine shooting, andlater that day seeing the news footage showing the kids running out of the school and away with their hands on their heads.  I cried then. 

I remember sitting on our couch--on my day off--VERY pregnant, watching the aftermath of the Oklahoma City bombing, just weeping about this awful world I was bringing this precious baby into.  How could I' dare that?

I felt like I'd been punched in the stomach at the news of the Aurora Colorado movie theater shooting this summer.  What began as an anticipated night of friends and fun, turned deadly and tragic.

How many more of these do we need to have?  What will it take for people to stop wanting to hurt others?  How bad does the earth have to get before the Lord just pulls the plug?

My heart breaks for the little families in that town--whether or not they lost their own children that day.  The town's children were taken.  One man's senseless act will be felt for generations and throughout our country.  Justice, surely, will come in the next life, but understanding here and now is harder to grasp.

Prayers, in the mean time, are all I can  offer.  And with them, I hope for peace and comfort for any with reasons to mourn.  And that really means all of us.

How Fragile We Are....

I got this following post on Facebook this evening...It was posted by a dear family friend I have known for years!  In fact, this family was the first to really light my fuse (pun intended) about "Cul-de-sac of Fire" possibilities!  They are large family who loves to ride dirt bikes, ATVs, and do all sort of fun--together.  This brother, Josh, is probably about 4-5 years younger than I am, and has a lovely wife, and five beautiful daughters.

Your prayers would be appreciated...for Josh, and his family.  They will get through this, like they do everything, TOGETHER.

John posted this following: 

For everyone concerned with Joshua's accident yesterday this is what he and his wife are willing to share...... Monday morning Josh was on his way to work. He was going west on Turner Rd just outside of Turlock, he was going to make a left on Kelly/Hills Ferry Rd towards Newman. A diesel truck with a trailer full of cows was heading north on Kelly Rd; The truck had a stop sign at the intersection where the 2 roads intersect. Josh did not have a stop sign. The dairy truck ran his stop sign and smashed into Josh crushing his left foot between the bumper of the truck & his bike's (motorcycle) frame, it knocked Josh 20 feet off the road. The impact caused irreparable damage to Josh's left foot. He was taken by a trauma helicopter to Modesto where after a lot of discussion with the Dr. and prayer, we felt that it was in the best interest for Josh and our family if we amputate his left foot. The doctor was concerned with infection and with closing the wound , he wanted to make sure that the skin was still viable to close. He will have a final amputation to mid-shin. This is what we have been told is the best place for prosthetic. We are told that he will be back to normal within 3-6 months. Your prayers and thoughts for Josh and our family are much appreciated. Josh has enjoyed me reading the posts messages, and texts. He has been touched by the outpouring of love and support from his friends and family.

 

Take care of yourselves and everyone you love.  You just never know what the day may hold.

Notes from the South

During our sojourn to the southern most state for our Christmas vacation, I noticed something that I didn't expect.  Well, I noticed many things I didn't expect, but today's post is really about only one thing.  Praying in public. 

Now, I don't mean formal public prayers--the likes of which are frowned upon as forcing religion on others.  I mean personal, silent prayers offered in an otherwise public place.  Like Del Taco, for instance.  Or Popeye's Chicken.  I noticed in both of the little fast food places we stopped into for lunch that customers, after receiving their food, would take a place in a booth or table and quietly and reverently--and particularly, privately--offer a little silent prayer.  I was impressed by this personal religious behavior I was able to witness.

Then it made me question:  Do I behave in such a way that others--those who may be casually observing me--would be able to tell that I was a woman of faith? A woman of God?  Would others see my behavior as one of a believer's?   A year or so ago our mutual theme for the year was "Be an example of the believers" taken from I Timothy 4:12.  Was I living up to that admonition?  The people I saw praying before having their lunch were certainly being examples of the believers.  But I don't think I was so much.

That made me wonder why.  And it humbled me to do better in my public life.

Maybe the south is full of believers.  That really isn't a good excuse for me.  I live surrounded by many people who believe as I do, yet I wasn't very good of demonstrating that faith in public. 

Was I afraid of what others might think of me?  No.  I don't think that is it.  I usually do what I do without thinking much about how it will reflect on me--good or bad.  (Ask any of the kids who witnessed my dancing at the Youth Conference dance back in June...or the stake dance about two weeks ago.  There was no thought of my stupidity showing through.)

The more I contemplated this, the more I think I had held back from praying in public in order to keep from offending others who might see me.  If that is indeed true, that is the lamest excuse ever.  Why should my personal religious behavior offend anyone?  Yet, there are examples of individuals taking offence directly because of others' religious behavior at every turn--some times it is with a political motivation.  (Remember the Prop 8 debacle in California? Or the kerfuffle anytime anyone mentions Mitt Romney's religion?) 

But even that is not an excuse to keep me from behaving as I know I should.

My only other potential reason, as far as I could come up with on a vacation, was that I was lazy.  Plain and simple.  I was living my religious belief in a lazy way.  And really, there is no excuse in that explanation.

If I believe, I need to show it.  If I have made covenants with God, then I need to live up to them.  If I accept what I understand of Jesus Christ being my personal Savior and Redeemer of the world, I need to obey Him.  And didn't He say, "If ye love me, keep my commandments?"  It really doesn't get any clearer than that.

I do love Him.  Yet, I have been lax in keeping His commandments.  I have been lazy, and more afraid of men than of God.  So, I stand corrected, and rightfully chastised.  I have asked for His forgiveness on this.  And I am trying to correct my ways.  In the grand scheme of things this is probably a little thing.  But I know that by small and simple things great things come to pass.  Someday I would like to be one of His great things.  I guess I have a long way to go.

Answered Prayers

I got a call about a week ago from my Stake President.  He asked if I would be willing to speak in Stake Conference next week.  Willing?  Yes.  Want to?  Well, that is another story. And he didn't want to hear it.

So for a week now I have fretted and worried and wondered about my talk.  The assigned topic was open to interpretation. But I have thought about it.  I have prayed about it.  And today I sat at the computer and tried to "free-write" all that I had thought and prayed about.

In the course of about 45 minutes, I got on paper the gist of what I want to say.  I got somethings I don't recall thinking or praying about too.  That is usually a good sign for me. I figure if I can't remember thinking of something, yet it ends up in the talk (or lesson, or whatever) I give the credit to the Spirit and go with that.

Now I have a few more days to ponder and practice and tweak it so it will be just right.  But the initial draft is always my worst fear.  Well, that and actually speaking at stake conference.  But too late for that now, isn't it?

Another Reminder

Today was a morning filled with lessons on asking prayers in faith and the return revelation that comes as answers to prayers.

Isn't it amazing that the God of all Creation, the Father of our spirits loves us enough to take the time to listen to our sometimes petty, other times fervent and even desperate pleas to Him for help and guidance?

Aren't you astonished that the Holy Ghost, a member of the godhead, will attend us as we pray in faith and return to us the answers we need to hear?

Can you even begin to comprehend how much the Savior of us all, and our elder brother, Jesus Christ loved us to atone for all the hurts, sorrows, and pains--as well as our sins--to be capable of removing that heartache from us when we need it so badly?

Do you remember to regularly take the time you should to think of these before you fall into bed, or hit the floor running in the morning and express your wonder, awe, gratitude and yearning?

Me neither. Thanks for the reminder today.